AdventuresWithMeg

Dating apps are interesting; in a way, it feels personal and impersonal. Some people could be amazing, but their profile isn’t engaging, and some have a lot and nothing in their profile at the same time; its rather surprising and annoying, but I want to connect with someone, but I dont have the energy some days after work to do that so the only people I really know are those I work with. There are limits to getting to know them during work as it’s usually busy, and I dont want to do anything that HR would have issues with (I dont think anyone is interested in me that way anyways, but it has to be said). Dating is always going to be weird, not wanting to be too comfortable yet not wanting to be too distant. Im thinking I may just kinda give up on dating for the moment; if something happens, it happens, but im good with what I have at the moment. 

I woke up late today, and I only had my caffeine much later than I usually do. I haven’t had the best sleep the last four days, and I did need a good deep sleep, I woke up in the same position I didn’t realize I fell asleep in, and I feel much better, but ive been taking it easy as I had so much sleep I feel a wee bit groggy still. It’s Cinaeds birthday today, so I called him and wished him a happy birthday and had a wee chat before I decided to get moving after sitting and enjoying some vera and breakfast. Im currently sitting in a McDonald’s with an iced coffee and a little snack cause I realized I should get some air, and a change of scenery may help me get my words out. It is working im getting more words out, but I put on my Celtic radio playlist, and I listen to that while I get some sun when it’s not behind a cloud here. 

I got an email before I left home today that my price for therapy is going down significantly, and im very excited about that, I really like the therapist I have currently, our next session isn’t until next week, and I have a list of things im going to bring up for them I know I forgot a few things already, but I found a few revelations, and it makes a lot of sense knowing these now.  

Vera has been playing while im home now, and I realized it is my comfort show, I love the books, and they are relaxing, but the show itself is more relaxing for me, I dont know if it’s the accents or what, but it just makes me feel like im home if that makes sense. I think the mix of Celtic music and Scottish shows is helping me to meditate somehow, I dont know exactly why, but I feel much more relaxed and the yoga I do when listening to or watching Vera has been more relaxing for me than when im listening to Celtic music. 

Im trying out Balance to help with meditation when im out and about or if I have a bout of anxiety while out, it’s said to help you sleep, but im not finding help with that personally its been good to calm the random panic/anxiety attacks I get every so often. 

Ive been thinking back about my list for the therapist, and something stuck out to me, I think the meeting I had with my manager and assistant concerned me at first, but it was the kick I needed to get into looking after myself better. I was initially concerned about losing my job, but since then, ive looked into apps to help with little things I forget and meditation, I found Finch, which helps with daily things, ive upped my use of some other apps, and thats had a significant change on my overall health, im looking into getting a gym membership once I finesse my budget more to make it fit and get a second job to help cover some things id like to do but dont have the funds for currently. 

I had a dream the other day when I got a little bit of sleep, I moved to Scotland on a whim in the dream, and I rented this tiny cottage on the coast, was blogging and doing honestly, im not sure for work, but it felt so peaceful. I could hear the sounds of the water on the shore when I opened the window in the dream, and I think I may have fallen in love with either Scotland or maybe a person. I dont know if the dream actually means something, if I should travel (I can’t right now for various reasons) or if my soulmate is Scottish, but it felt relaxing, and I did enjoy remembering the dream. 

I just got an email from my therapist, I sent her a link to the blog because this is where I post some of the more vulnerable yet not revealing things, I share my opinions I dont tell others to cause it takes me a while to percolate my thoughts and to share what’s making my life easier regardless of what im battling behind the scenes. Therapists are amazing, I know they deal with so many things and they themselves are human and may need services they give to others, too, but I can’t think of anything bad to say about the ones ive had the pleasure of dealing with. I really dont know where this post is going, but my thumbs getting sore from holding down the button to type, so im going to be off for the day, I hope your day is lovely! 

Till Next Time, 

Meg

Main Image by David Mark from Pixabay