It’s been an interesting start to the year; my grandfather has passed on, and im just starting to feel more human. Ive worked every day since, and ive now had yesterday and today (as im writing this) off, and im processing the fact hes gone and my emotions around it.
Ive been alot quieter, and I ended up having a breakdown on friday while at work; someone was being nice, and I just started crying, and I couldn’t stop. It felt much better, I didn’t have a tight chest, and my face was red and blotchy, but I felt like I could breathe, which was nice. Ive told most of my coworkers, but a few dont know; if they didn’t when I was there, they do know, as they sent me home early, and it’s the first time they have seen me be anything but happy and maybe a wee bit annoyed on occasion. The People who come in regularly have been looking at me, wondering why ive been quieter and not as happy; ive told a few people cause I was able to say it without crying. Some I won’t tell cause I dont know them as well, and some just make me feel slimy when I interact with them, so thats my intuition is telling me something there.
I have good people around me at work, they have been supporting me, and they have been letting me process while telling me jokes and talking about everything under the sun to let me think of something other than what’s been going on. I gave a few of them a hug and said thank you to them cause I appreciate the effort and the things they have been doing to make me feel a bit more human.
I have good people in my life outside of work, ive talked with Cinaed, my siblings, aunts and uncles, and the Timon to my Pumba. Ive had a few thoughts since last weekend; one is to appreciate what and who’s around you, to take pictures when you can even if you dont think it’s the right time and time spent is more valuable than anything.
Life is not guaranteed; people will come and go, places will change, and you may be very surprised at how it will turn out.
Thats all I have today, im off to cuddle Wee Pup and do my nails as some self-care; I hope you’re having a lovely day.
Till Next Time,
Main image by Me.